What are the characteristics a successful marriage?

According to the Bible, the Holy Spirit changes our hearts and brings about kindness as soon as we are saved.

A young wife continued, "It helps to remember that you're on the same team. You don't want your partner to 'win' a disagreement because it would require you to lose. You should battle for your marriage as a team, not as "you versus them."

WHAT HAPPENS WHEN THE NORMAL SCUFFLES IN WEDDED BLISS TRANSFORM TO RELATIONSHIP TRAUMA? IS A CHRISTIANITY CHALLENGE.

A third pair joined in, saying, "Share each other's passions." "Learn more about something if you don't like it but the other person loves it. You could end up like it after all.

Everything everyone mentioned was wonderful. The straightforward statement confirmed what I had read about marital contentment, namely that compassion binds couples together.

Being kind is essential for a happy marriage.

You might believe that there are other factors involved in a successful union. Perhaps effective communication or sexual compatibility. or not having issues with your in-laws or money.

A giving mindset, or appreciating your spouse's intentions, even if the execution is questionable, is crucial, according to studies.

Each of them matters, of course. But kindness is the most important factor in predicting long-term stability and marital satisfaction.

Kindness matters.

Additionally, it goes beyond simply bringing your partner a cup of coffee in the morning (although National Marriage Project researchers place a lot of emphasis on small gestures of love like that). A giving mindset, or appreciating your spouse's intentions even if the execution is questionable, is crucial, according to studies.

For instance, it's possible that your husband simply forgot to lower the toilet seat and wasn't "deliberately" trying to irritate you. Your wife might not be "on purpose" being late for supper. Perhaps she only needed to to the store to pick up your gift.

I'll go ahead and admit that I didn't make up those examples (as someone who frequently keeps her spouse waiting but never shows up with a gift. One of the "Love Lab" psychologists gave them to me.)

The issue with kindness is that it is not something we either possess or lack.

However, you get the gist. Instead than focusing on your spouse's flaws, search for things you can admire and express gratitude for. Respect should always be shown consciously. As the Bible advises, treat your partner with humility and put their needs ahead of your own.

What if, though, I'm not really so nice?

I know what some of you are probably thinking. When I read the research, I had the same reaction. I told myself, "I truly want to be kinder to Robbie. I'm just not that polite, though.

(It is real. My husband is far more considerate and kind than I am, both to me and to other people. I might make friends for us, but Robbie is the one who retains them, as I've frequently stated.

The thing about kindness, though, is that it's not something we either own or lack. According to the Bible, the Holy Spirit changes our hearts and brings about kindness as soon as we are saved. Paul declares that "love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control" are the characteristics of the Holy Spirit. All of these other qualities that God has given us, including kindness, are also at our disposal.

A recent Wall Street Journal story claimed that prayer can be effective even when one or both partners are acting cruelly.

It functions like a muscle and gets stronger with time.

Additionally, prayer makes it stronger.

Which also brings up some other fascinating research on marriage. A recent Wall Street Journal story claimed that prayer can be effective even when one or both partners are acting cruelly. "Both partners—the one praying and the one being prayed for—report greater relationship satisfaction when people pray for the wellbeing of their spouse when they feel a negative emotion in the marriage."

"More satisfied with the relationship." That seems really official and important. But how about we state the obvious?

Don't become angry with your spouse if you're unhappy with them because they did something like leave the toilet seat up or were late again. Instead, consider praying for them.

You will both be happier as a result.

God the Father, May we treat one another with kindness and compassion, forgiving one another as Christ forgave us. (Ephesians 4:32).